Released 2006, Leisure Publishing, 309 Pages
Book #1 in The Beast House Series
This is about a house rumored to contain a blood-thirsty beast. It starts out with a triple murder, then more murder, and as a topper an innocent child is abused and molested in typical Laymon style. It's hard to stomach the kiddie stuff, it really is, and I don't understand the need to put it in the book (there are other way to allude to it without the graphics) but I plodded on hoping it wouldn't continue in this vein.
I resisted the urge to DNF and finished every last word but I can't really say that I'm proud of the fact. Laymon's writing has a way of sucking you in and not letting you go, right? Right?! It's not just me. It can't be.
Still I'd be lying if I said I thought this was one of his best (The Travelling Vampire Show is by far his best). I thought The Cellar was ridiculous and riddled with plot holes. Basically it forces us to follow around a nasty pedophile as he commits atrocities, two horny dummies hot for the pedophile's wife and Donna (and her child) who is the wife on the run who has abysmal luck, poor thing. She has run-ins with every lecherous man on the planet and ultimately ends up meeting the beast who resides in "The Cellar. There's lots of rape and some piss poor characterization to add some spice. A little past a third of the way through the book delves into the past of the "beast" because, well we had to know, didn't we? It's so silly that it's unintentionally hilarious.
Don't even get me started on the WTF ending. What did I just read?! I'm doing my best not to spoil things if you are inclined to check out this monstrosity for yourself. But, damnitall, the last chapter made no sense when given the fact that the woman/child had been abused throughout the entire book. When on earth did they develop a weird, unearthly attraction to white hairless,be-jowled beasts with lots of teeth and huge male parts? Ew, no. Please god no.I'll never get those scenes out of my head. Sexy? I think not . . . Gross? You betcha. If this sounds like fun give it a go but don't say I didn't warn you.
Want more bitchery? Read my The Beast House review.